Blow Out The Candles And...

She's at home alone tonight.
Again.
She reaches for yet another wrapped chocolate even though she knows she shouldn't. She wears the same red heavy sweatshirt cardigan that she has for years. She also folds an afghan over her lap and slips her feet into footie socks. She leafs through month old newspapers and clips out updates on her son's high school mates while she waits for the cookies to harden. Which she will then lay down into the wax paper lined, shortbread tin she saves just for this one occasion every year. These clippings will eventually be folded into his birthday card. Two layers of cookies, one piece of bread to (hopefully) lock in the freshness, and a card full of black and white announcements about babies, weddings, police reports, hospital updates. The card will remind her son that his birthday takes her back to 30 years ago, when she first held him, listened to his beating heart and fell so deep in amazement with him. The card will remind her son that his mother relives the wonder and meaning of this special day. The card will also say that she forgot to tell him so many things about the journey that the world held for him. She signs it with "Love you Lots exclamation point"

She sends it off knowing her other gift will arrive in a phone call on his actual day.

The cookies arrive just in time. The freshness locked in. The clippings are meaningless facts about people who have become strangers. But, the clipped edges and the perfect folds are full of sentimental messages from the mother. She has no wealth. She has no monetary gift for her 30 year old son. She has only her cookies and her well wishes.

She calls him on the day. She is no singer, but her and her son share a strong love for music and lyrics. She props the phone on an angle and asks for four minutes of her son's time and begins to sing...

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,

and each road leads you where you wanna go,

and if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,

I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.

And if one door opens to another door closed,

I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,

if it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile.

But more than anything, more than anything...

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more than you can hold,

and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but you never forget,

all the ones who love you, in the place you left,

I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,

and you help somebody every chance you get,

Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,

and always give more than you take.

But More than anything, yeah, more than anything...

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more than you can hold,

and while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

Her son is 30 today.